the prostration zone

Words, food, it all suddenly seems meaningless, ridiculous, after the arrival of a new human being, right in our bedroom, just a few weeks ago. But we’ve got to emerge sometime..

She is The One explosive present moment spectacular road-show happening all day every day (and night). Her whimpers would melt the hardest heart, her screams could break a monk’s order. She has the highest cheek to body-weight ratio of any mammal I’ve ever seen, and she demands (loudly) at least 6 miles of vigorous walking every day. Doesn’t matter if it’s along the headland or around the room, but she can sense the moment i sit down and pretend to be walking.. life is already, never the same again.

she also loves dancing

I could wax on for pages, about her range of wacky expressions, her little mudras, but this is officially a food blog, so better get down to it.

Saturday morning; I was standing in a chaotic kitchen, a spiraliser in my hand, aching for inspiration, looking at breakfast’s leftovers and some random veg. Then something sublime happened..

Cucumber and Pear Udon noodles
with shredded Mint and Dandelion leaves
in Almond and Mead cream ‘soup’

fresh as a surprise kiss on a june afternoon

I used some special ingredients because they happened to be lying around, but i’ve put substitutes below. It’ll still work.


1/2 large cucumber
2 pears
about 20 mint leaves – shredded
about 12 dandelion leaves – shredded (use rocket if you don’t have hedgerow access).

1 cup of Almond milk (or the milk of your choice)
1 tablespoon Moscatel vinegar (or the juice of one lime and a teaspoon of honey or maple syrup)
1 1/2 tablespoons Olive Oil
1/4 cup of soaked buckwheat (or soaked sunflower seeds)
1 tablespoon of Honey Mead (or sweet wine or sherry would work – or add a bit more of the lime and honey mix with a dash of cyder vinegar)
The bits of pear and cucumber that don’t make it through the spiraliser (or if your machine does the whole thing, then keep back a little for the dressing).

Spiralise the cucumber and pear on the fattest setting (if you don’t have a spiraliser you can grate them) and toss them in half of the Moscatel vinegar (or sweet lime mix) with the shredded dandelions and mint.

In your blender whizz the rest of the ingredients to make the ‘soup’.

Pour over the noodles and serve chilled. (if you’re not chilled when you serve it, you will be when you’ve eaten it..)

It works best alone or as a starter. It only took about 7 minutes.

Here next week, our contrastingly unsentimental Jubilee special..

For now, so long wrigglers.
Deep peace of the snoring babe to you.